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credits

released October 19, 2016

all instruments & vocals - matt perrin

recorded in the basement of this house in september of 2016

recorded, mixed, and mastered by james rumsey

only peavey amplifiers were used on these recordings.

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Track Name: idontrememberthelasttimeihadfun.net
this fucking sucks.

the way the void calls
and i can't seem to resist
how it ticks, and clicks
and i can't bloody think straight
under weights that my brain seems to replicate

and my mouth runs on like faucet
spewing bullshit with a hint of fluoride
i can't grasp a single thing around me
even if it were in plain sight

i don't really wanna fucking talk about it
i don't wanna take your fucking pills about it

and i can't come down, and i can't get up
i don't see the point in living in this hellhole

and i drag myself underwater
abandoning family and friends
i have found comfort in being sad
but i simply cannot pretend

i don't really wanna fucking talk about it
i don't wanna take your fucking pills about it

oh my god, i hate myself.

i don't remember the last time that i had any damn fun.
Track Name: life at 0mph
for the first time in what feels like forever
i'm standing on the edge of this cliff
and i don't wanna jump

who the hell might you be? and where the hell did you come from?
you've got me starstruck and my head spinning in more ways than one.

have we seem to have met?
'cause you're familiar,
the way you tuck your hair and hide your smile is beautiful.

and my brain won't think past this, it halts without movement
you live so far away but at this very moment it all feels worth it

i look into those blue eyes
i see a glimmer of hope
something i don't understand
but something i'd like to know.
Track Name: skrrrrrrtt!!!
hey! what do the kids pay?
to think they're happy these days?
i'll take a good guess
and say and arm and leg

i don't feel so good, but what's new?

"oh, would you fuck death?
well, i would.
right now it's the only damn thing that turns me on."

i'd guess i'd say, i hate this place
i can't seem to shake the feeling
that i don't feel safe
i don't think that i'm safe
i really don't feel safe
i don't feel fucking safe

and i'm looking back at lost opportunities, and it seems to me

i sit here once again in solitude
knowing that i have failed
like putting a gun to my mouth
and not being able to pull the trigger.
Track Name: side pocket
how many years has it been since we last met?
this feeling of butterflies also comes with a side of regret

i can't seem to get over this feeling
that i will never love someone like you again

and i stand in place
it's my shot to take
but i can't focus now
cycling through thoughts again

but i've come to terms, and time has done its job

but i must say that you look great
and i just hope you're doing okay.
Track Name: permanent shrug
this is getting old, this is getting far to old for me too deal with.

i can't seem to pinpoint all the causes that my brain and body feel like total shit

my body aches
and i can't think straight
what's the point of waking up tomorrow morning?

and i feel left out, contemplation trapped in observation feeding doubt

and i inch my way out of this hole, only to be kicked down once more

here i lay, wasting away the day once again
i can't sleep, i'm seeing figures in my dreams.
Track Name: the slate is too clean
and with the strike of a match, comes the dissonance
a structure meant to fail, a structure meant to break
and i crawl back, out of this grave that i dug myself

and you think that i forgot about this?
the wound is still fresh as shit.

can't seem to shake this stream of bad luck of overcoming me

and i feel defeated, these cuts on my wrist will show

fully invasive, mind penetrating, replaying past moments of self
and i'm stuck reliving this nightmare that you'd once call good luck

and this feels so familiar, is this some kind of test?

oh and i can't seem to get over this, the slate is too clean
putting all this bullshit behind me.